Decisions
by toobeauty
Summary: Just what it says on the title ...
1. Prologue

TITLE: _**"Decisions"**_

PAIRING: Hephaestion and Alexander.

RATING: PG

CATEGORY: Historical AU.

DISCLAIMER: I do not know the people involved, no harm intended, everything is product of my imagination, but I would not mind sharing my life with the blue-eyed god.

WARNINGS: Some tissues available for later chapters.

NO BETA so all mistakes are mine.

FEEDBACK: comments are love! Yes, please any kind of them will help me to improve my writing or leave it forever.

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_**Prologue.**_

Decisions are the result of the simple act of making up one's mind after we have evaluated all our choices.

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Decisions are the result of our process of deciding when we are faced with a situation.

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Decisions are also our own ability to make a firm judgement and stick to it, no matter the consequences it may bring.

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Decisions are those thoughts turned into actions that define us and sometimes, we make a decision without thinking about ourselves but about others …


	2. Chapter 1 out of 4

_**Part 1.**_

A pair of light green eyes followed the path of two youths towards the baths. Any other pair of eyes would have appreciated that vision; both young men had toned and strong bodies and they were truly handsome.

However, this particular pair of green eyes showed only disappointment at that enticing view.

Both youths were walking side by side, letting their shoulders brush the other's from time to time. A shy smile, followed by a knowing look was exchanged between them and both pairs of eyes, one cyan and the other mismatched, revealed, just for few seconds, the true feeling that they were trying so hard to hide from the rest of their companions.

She had already talked about the problem with one of the young men but it seemed that their long conversation had not had the desired effect. While watching them walking away, she thought that she would have to talk to the other young man. She knew that she had to be subtle but strong; that brunette was too smart and had a quick mind and he would quickly suspect about her. She already knew that it would not be easy to convince him of her reasons. He had already showed how strong- minded he was but she had an ace up the sleeve.

She knew that both young men had got laid together several times and that her son had quite vocally expressed his desire and love for the blue-eyed youth. He had never minded about the many prospective lovers, all of them female, that she had sent to his inner chamber, night after night, for the last six months.

All those women had received the same answer "No, thank you" and were quickly dismissed but politely.

The beautiful woman knocked on the wood door. She had been watching the place and had seen her son leaving that chamber to go back to his own. She smiled widely; the brunette would surely accept anything she asked, feeling sated after their lovemaking.

Hephaestion opened the door with a broad smile in his still flushed face, thinking that it was Alexander who had finally decided to stay the whole night by his side. However, the happy expression quickly disappeared when he realized who his visitor was.

He looked at the woman and asked reverently:

"What can I do for you, my Queen?"

"My dear Hephaestion, may I come in?" she asked sweetly.

"I don't think it would be appropriate, being so late, milady" he answered.

"But Hephaestion, you are like a son to me; nobody would dare to think differently" she replied while entering his chamber.

Hephaestion was nervous, a feeling that only that woman had been able to awake and right in that moment, he did not like her fake smile. He had felt her jealous eyes following his movements and he already had a very clear idea of what might be happening in the woman's mind.

"So, my Queen, as I have already said it is rather late; however I will do whatever you need before I turn in" Hephaestion offered.

"Of course, my dear, it is just a simple plea from a worried mother to the closest friend of her beloved son" she said submissively while casting down her eyes.

However, that fawning attitude put Hephaestion on the alert; he could feel a confrontation coming between them.

"Well, you can tell me what is worrying you and I will see what I can do to help" Hephaestion replied politely.

"Well … some ill rumours about Alexander are spreading all over the palace. They assured that he loved you over any woman and, as you well know, that cannot be possible. Alexander needs a wife to bear his children but he refuses to leave you, so I was thinking that maybe you can step aside and set him free" she said and remained in silence while awaiting Hephaestion's reply.

The brunette took a seat on his bed, sighed loudly and cleared his throat. At the mere sound of that, the Queen lifted her eyes and Hephaestion could see the glow of triumph on them.

"No" he replied firmly.

"What have you just said?" the Queen could not believe what she was hearing,

"I said NO. I will not step aside. I have promised Alexander to be always by his side, to share his dreams and help him to fulfill them. I have also promised to love him forever and to respect any decisions he has to take as regards our relationship. It is our decision and no one else's so if that was your plea, you have already had your answer" Hephaestion said while standing up and walking towards his chamber door.

Olympias stood up and walked slowly towards him. She was going to express her disagreement but a single look at those clear blue eyes made her change her mind. She just nodded and Hephaestion opened the door slowly.

"Health to you, my Queen" Hephaestion said.

"Health to you, my son, you truly are Alexander too" Olympias replied and left the chamber.


	3. Chapter 2 out of 4

_**Part 2.**_

The king looked at his General and sighed loudly. He knew that he needed an heir but he did not want to hurt his lover by marrying another.

Alexander also knew that Hephaestion was not a weak man, quite the opposite and if some of the companions wanted to see him as a poor sycophant, it was their problem but sooner or later they would have to stop taking Hephaestion for granted and see what he was really capable of.

His many triumphs were mostly belittled because they did not take place on the battlefield but his witty mind and strong and diplomatic logic had won more battles than their swords.

Alexander wanted to show everybody how important Hephaestion's role was for the Army and his ever-growing empire but he realized that most of them would think that he was doing that because the blue-eyed man was the one who had been warming his bed for so many years.

If only they knew how wrong they were; how many times Hephaestion had been his only support during his nightmares, or how well he knew him, up to the point of guessing what he needed even before himself.

Hephaestion was the calm after the storm; his shelter when the situation went out of hands; his rock when everything around him started to tumble, his loyal confident who kept his deepest fears in secret; the voice of reason when his own arrogance was unleashed …

Hephaestion meant so much to him that he could not conceive a single moment of his life without him in it. He also knew that Hephaestion would understand and accept his reasons for choosing a wife, even if he did not like it.

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Alexander quietly approached the other man and snaked his arms around the slender waist, letting his right cheek rest on the strong back.

Hephaestion, who was adding some more details on one of his latest maps, stopped his work and patted the big hands that were entwined and resting over his flat stomach.

"What's wrong, my King?" he asked softly, without turning round.

"You do know how much I love you, don't you?" Alexander whispered.

"Yes, I do, almost as much as I love you" Hephaestion replied and covered the king's hands with his own.

"And you do know that sometimes I have to take a decision against my own will but that it will favour many people …" he added.

"Yes, I do, my Alexander and that is why I try to take my own decisions to make your job a little bit more simple and as easy as I can" he replied and showed his blonde in his tone of voice how true his words were.

"I know that, my love. I just want the others to see you as I do" Alexander said and sighed loudly again.

"I don't really care if they do that or not, the only important thing to me is that you do and I couldn't love you more for that" Hephaestion answered and his voice was as strong as before.

The brunette decided to end his confession and turned round slowly inside the circle of his soul mate's arms. He then took the blonde head between his hands and peppered the young face with tiny kisses to finally take his lips in a heart-stopping kiss.

When the kiss was over, Alexander sighed loudly for the third time but this last time he was completely satisfied with his last decision, he would take a wife for the benefit of his people but his heart would remain loyal and would always belong to the man in his arms.


	4. Chapter 3 out of 4

**_Part 3._**

Twilight was approaching and the end of the battle was still uncertain. The toughened Macedonian king rallied his troops to charge against the enemy once again, as they had been doing since Helios had appeared in the sky.

Suddenly a deadly silence fell over the battlefield. Thousands of rude Macedonian soldiers let their horrified gasps escape their mouths when they looked forwards. Their heated blood froze inside their veins and their eyes could not believe the image they were seeing.

The enemy king had captured General Amyntoros and he held him tightly against his chest. The tip of a sharp knife was aiming directly to the brunette's heart. Alexander looked in the same direction when his Army remained motionless in their spot. That was the moment when he saw his soul mate of twenty years and the extremely delicate situation he was facing.

The foreign king smirked widely and shouted loudly from the other side of the battlefield:

**"Him or thousands?"**

The man already knew too well that Hephaestion was Alexander's partner and his main and only weakness.

At first, Alexander did not understand the question until he let his mismatched eyes wander around the battlefield and he saw how his enemies and their allies had them surrounded, assuring their imminent defeat and death. The blonde king had taken a wrong decision for the very first time in many years and he had to face the consequences.

Alexander set his eyes on Hephaestion's cerulean ones, which had a clear and determined look. He stared at the still strong but now captive frame of his General, a body he knew as well as his own, and sighed loudly.

He could listen to his officers whispering among them and the nervousness of his soldiers because they already guessed what his answer would be.

Alexander took out his helmet, its weight did not let him think clearly; he lowered his sword and shield, which were extremely heavy for his tired arms … he cast down his eyes and slapped the treacherous tears that were threatening to roll down his grimy cheeks.

The earth was quiet, not a single sound could be heard while the king of the known world took his decision.

Minutes later, he lifted his eyes and looked at Hephaestion who gave him a small but intimate smile while he let the sharp knife pierce his heart by pushing his chest towards it.

The enemy king gasped in astonishment due to the General's decision and his men remained still while secretly admiring the man's courage.

Alexander, with slow and tired steps, approached the other king and silently extended his arms. Hephaestion's cooling body was gently put in them and the enemy king nodded at Alexander who only dared to hug the bloody frame against his chest.

There were neither victor nor vanquished in that battle, only the deep feeling of loss and unconditional sacrifice of only one man to save his king and partner's sanity.


	5. Chapter 4 out of 4

_**Part 4.**_

Alexander remained quiet for a whole week, looking at the corpse of his soul mate that had been prepared for his last travel. He decided for a simple burial, nothing pompous and that decision surprised everybody who was expecting something majestic, worthy of a king.

Hephaestion had been an austere man and even though he had enjoyed having nice and expensive things from time to time, he had never been eager to achieve big amounts of money, properties or lands.

Alexander had carefully chosen the clothes and jewelry his partner would wear in the afterlife. Every single piece of garment and jewel had a strong significance for both of them and that simple gesture truly showed how deep Alexander's love for his Phai was and would always be.

The burial ceremony was intimate and after it finished, Alexander went back to his tasks, working very long hours and resting too little. When his body could not follow that fast rhythm anymore, the king decided to slow down and take care of himself, knowing that Hephaestion would be angry if he didn't.

Alexander went on living, barely existing, hiding his true feelings to his men but when the load was too heavy to be carried, he decided it was high time that he let himself go and look for his soul mate so they could be reunited again.

It was not a sudden decision but a well-thought one. One hot afternoon, having his battered body ransacked by a high fever, Alexander took his final decision and pleaded to his heart to stop its movements.

The Macedonian king had always taken decisions in favour of others; for the first and last time, he wanted to be selfish and take the best decision for himself. Completely convinced that it was what he desired with his heart, body and soul, he chose walking out of his world full of pain and loneliness where he no longer wanted to live and meeting his loving Hephaestion to share their afterlife together.

Finis


End file.
